The Apfent is the best time of the winter. 

Most people have a flu in winter. She’s having a fever. 
We also have one, but it is with lighting and you write it with K. 

Three weeks before the Christkindl comes Papa sets up the crib in the living room and my little sister and I can help. 
Many cribs are boring but ours are not because we have murderous great figures in it. 
Once I put the Josef and the Christkindl on the stove to keep them warm and it was too hot for them. 

Christkindl has turned black and Josef has torn it into nothing but rubble. 
One foot of it has flown into the Plätzlteig and it was not a nice sight.
My mom scolded me and said that not even the saints are safe from my stupidity. 

When Mary stands around with no husband or child, she does not look good. 
But thank goodness I have many figures in my toy box and Josef is now Donald Duck. 
As a Christkindl I wanted to take the Asterix, because he is the only one so small that he would have fit into the feeding trough. 
Since my mother has said, but you can not take Asterix as Christkindl, because the burned Christkindl is even better. It is black, but at least a Christkindl. 

Behind the Christkindl are two oxen, a donkey, a hippopotamus and a brontosaur.
I put the hippopotamus and the brontosaur, because the ox and the donkey were too boring for me. 

Just to the left of the stable are the three holy kings. 
A king fell down to his dad’s last pawn cleaning and was dodal. 
Now we have only two sacred kings and one holy batman to replace. 

Normally the sacred three kings have a lot of stuff for the Christ child, namely gold, frankincense and puree or something like that. 
One of our own has a chewing gum paper instead of gold, which also shines beautifully. 
The other one has a Marlboro in his hand because we do not have frankincense. But the Marlboro smokes nicely when you light it.

The holy Batman has a pistol with him. Although this is not a gift for the Christkindl, but he can protect it from the dinosaur. 
Behind the three saints are a pair of red-skinned Indians and a kasiger angel. 
The angel broke off a foot, so we put him on a motorcycle to make it easier. He can ride a motorcycle if he is not flying. 

Right next to the stable, we have put a Little Red Riding Hood. 
She has a pizza and three wheat for her grandma and is just ripping off a chestnut. 
We do not have a wolf, so behind the tree a bummerl peeks out as a replacement wolf. 

There is nothing more in our crib, but that’s enough.

In the evening we turn on the lights and then our crib is really nice. 
We sit around singing songs of the Apfent. 
Some like me, but most of them are too much for me. 
My grandfather learned me a poem from the Apfent and it goes like this: 
“Apfent, Apfent, the bear-root is burning.” First drink, then three-four, then you hit the door with your brain. ” 
Although the poem is pretty beautiful, Mama said I should not know it. 

In the Apfent is also tinkered. We have a big bowl full of nuts and a small full of gold dust. 
In it, we roll the nuts until they are golden, and the Christkindl hangs them later on the Christmas tree.
One should not breathe, because the gold dust is dodal light and he flies around when you breathe. 

Once I put in a powder of sneeze in the gold dust and as my father rolled the first nut in it, he did a sneeze that it tore him and his face was golden and the nut was not. 
Mama scolded him for not having control, and she said he’s more stupid than a kid. 

My father was very upset about it and he did not participate anymore. 
He said that there was something wrong with the gold dust, and Mama said that at most there was something wrong with him. 
I was very happy, because it was a fun dinner on the whole. 

Just before Christmas we have to write our wish list.
My sister usually wants dolls or else a club. 
As a precaution, I write more things on it and in the end I write the Christkindl, it should just buy so much until the money runs out. 

My mom says that is an impudence and at some point the Christkindl brings me nothing, because I am not modest. 

But so far I have always got something. 
And when I grow up and earn a living, I buy something myself and am not modest at all. Then the Christkindl can annoy me, because then I do not care. 

Until you look the Apfent is over and Christmas too and with the year it goes there.
The gifts are unpacked and you get nothing until Easter, at most, if you have a birthday. 

But one thing is good: 
the Apfent keeps coming back.

Funny Story